I've rattled this headline around in my head for several days now, only to see that Chris Muir has come to this conclusion too, with Muir connecting the medical marijuana issue to Dean's unfortunate verbal outbursts. I suggest that Dr. Dean may be prescribing something stronger than grass for himself. And, he should check the dosage, because it isn't working. He remains as delusional as ever. Perhaps he should skip the pills and change his diet, eat some red meat Howie! It may be a nutritional deficit, not a chemical imbalance corrected by hallucinogenics and antidepressants Doc.
My concern for his health, and ours if he keeps bothering our blood pressure with his bizarre perceptions, has me wondering if it isn't time to begin administering tox screens to the former Govenor. Just as we need to know that America's athletes are not hyped up when they take the field, we should know if our national clowns are doping. Of course we will need to establish standards for what I will call, Dean's PUI level, (PUI, paranoid under the influence), so that we may determine when it is the drugs that are making him see things, and when not.
Of course, this line of sensibilty led me to consider similar testing for other DNC moonbats.
A breathalizer test each time Ted Kennedy steps to the podium. (So obvious we must all wonder why we haven't thought of this one before now, eh?).
A polygragh for each member of the former Clinton adminstration. It will be necessary to closely define what is meant by "lie" before putting these folks to the test. ("Well, it depends on the meaning of lie, it could mean to hold your body in the prone position, (under his breath in a Beavis and Butthead voice, "he he, I said prone, and position, he he"), and it does sound just like lye, so it depends on which meaning...."- A Fake Wm J. Clinton quote). It may be a lengthy challenge for them to master the concept that to "lie" is to not tell the truth. First we will have to explain "truth". Oh, why bother, we already know what that test will show.
A retina scan for Nancy Pelosi, because we need to know that it is really her behind that surgically altered face, and not Kim Jong Il after a mug switch (ala Travolta and Cage in Face Off).
While magician's have fooled us for years in spite of the hoop test, it might still be useful to have a pretty woman pass a hoop over Harry Reid to somewhat assure us that Tom Daschle is neither pulling strings from above, nor has his hand from below, in manipulating the Senate minority leader. The test may be unreliable, but the scenery will make his appearances on the nightly news more bearable.
A brain scan for Jimma Carter, to see if there is any peanut inside that shell. I hear that we have the technology to make this determination, though it isn't always used when needed.
A simple bloodtest on James Carville. Check to see if it is red, and not alien green. If he is from this planet, one would be tempted to determine if there was some inbreeding in his past, but, then again, his wife Mary has enough burden without learning that her husband is his own grandpa. And, besides, my college anthropology professor assured us there is not a correlation between limited gene pools and insanity.
And, naturally, a look at Ward Churchill's mitochondrialDNA could resolve once and for all any doubt, even his own, about his native American heritage.
And imagine how much guessing would have been put aside if we had simply been allowed a look at Janet Reno's chromosones Should she really be on the list of theirs, vs ours?(previous link). We have the technology. Hey, as long as we are testing Churchill, this may be worth a glance on him too, he looks so much like one of theirs.
Maybe an INS investigation into the citizenship status of anyone who criticizes the Minuteman Project. Because interfering with these peaceable people interested only in monitoring our borders is clearly not in the best interest of the good ol' USA. (Do they have a test yet which reliably predicts anti-Americanism among citizens of this country? Maybe the person who can quantify that trait for detection hasn't been born yet.)
These are but a few of the scientific methods we might employ to explain and confirm the origins of the moonbat left and the influences that lead to their mindless ramblings, and their repeated attempts to institute policies that are proven failures. While this testing, and a consequent intelligent debate on the real solutions for our country's needs, may lead to a scarcity of hyperbole, with so much at stake can we afford to not make the investment. For the children. Because this era is the most, first, largest, unprecedented, worst, least, never before, whitest, unparralleled, Christianest, racistest, gulagest, whatever, ever. And we have a right to know......
I welcome your suggestions for other tests whose time have come. And watch for the television version, coming soon, CSI DNC.